This Christmas

This will be an indulgent blog entry. My Christmas, without any concern for the reader. Just what I want to remember. And, for the purpose of self-decompression... (I love ending random sentences with "...")

Christmas was surprisingly stressful, in the sense of go here, go there, wrap this, buy this, don't forget that, get the kids ready, fit in baby naps first, is there enough for my generous parents to unwrap? And, don't forget the dirty house! I have four children and a busy life. Seriously, my house needs to be cleaned 24/7. Ugh!

I snapped at my hubby a few times. Someone needed to be blamed for my stress. If only he'd do MORE and SOONER, then I would have no stress. Yah, right. The reality is, he did much, and I just wanted him to be my saviour and be perfect. It's hard to let that go when there is so much to do and it seems to all fall on me! Or... did I take that on myself, the woman who must do it all and do it all well. I watched a terrible Christmas movie with that message, though poorly conveyed. Still it served some purpose in making me look at myself. Do I really look at what is important? Do I really let others help me? Can I let go of the insignificant details?

Well, I tried. I probably did the best I could do in that regard. And, I did do it enough to enjoy and recognize what was really important to me. I noticed my children's sense of humor many times. It was truly satisfying. I noticed their excitement and gratitude and pure joy. Of course they loved the gifts, but they had the best time enjoying moments with their loved ones. I am so proud to be their mom. Even with all of the moments I failed them, they are turning into wonderful young men.

I relished the 26 hours that I had my sister all to myself (with my kids and hubby of course, but she mirrored my activities and we did everything together). She is a brilliant young adult, still she's dorky, just like me. No expectations, no hang-ups, just hanging out. I will cherish this Christmas with her forever. Okay, I'll just admit it; this was the prized jewel in this mosaic Christmas. (And it's not just because she is an obsessive cleaner, something missing in my house.)

My dad and his girlfriend were invested in our family by cooking great food, playing games with us, laughing and being merry. Our Christmas with them was more than I could have hoped for.

My stepmom spoiled my children in ways only she can. She swooped in with her magical dust and left the boys in a joyful stupor.

My mother-in-law and brother-in-law were so full of love and doting over the kids. It was calm and pleasant. This reminded me how much we love our family.

Finally, at my mom and stepdad's the Christmas story was read. Happy Birthday to Jesus was sung. It brought it all together. And we hunkered down for a long evening, waiting for the snow to diminish so we could have better than a "not-so-enjoyable traverse" home. (Did I mention that the TouchTMJ4.com Christmas Eve reporter was very entertaining with the worst ever weather report in human history?)

My Christmas was far from perfect, yet it was one of the best ever! We spent it with everyone we love. There was no fighting. There was lots of laughter, joy and appreciation. It was... fabulous!